DALE

‘Women have the advantage over men in that when things go wrong we can throw a hissy fit and bawl for a while. It makes everything a little better. ’

The Glded Lilly (moi)

Is there such a thing as luck? Or do we earn our just desserts? In other words, get what we deserve?

There are days when everything goes so well that I’m skipping on cloud nine. Then there are literally weeks like one not long ago. That was the week from .... well, down below.

First, my laptop hard drive fried. Had to take it to the “pooter doctor” and learned that it would have to be sent back to the manufacturer since it is under warranty — which would only take two or three weeks. Weeks? Without a computer? Nuh-uhh!

Then we had a doozy of a power outage that week. All the area was black for about an hour. Seems that the outage did something to my satellite dish receiver. I spent two hours on the phone with tech support to no avail. As it ended up, they are going to send me a new one ... the catch … it’s going to take a “few days.” So, no TV on the weekend. No computer. I like the TV on for the noise if nothing else. Miss my Investigation Discovery, NatGeo and History and Bio channels most.

Thought things were easing up. After all, I’m basically a good person. If you don’t dig too deep.

Then I had a daymare. I got a traffic ticket in Southaven. I’m boycotting Southaven. They are not going to have the exquisite pleasure of my company ‘til they straighten up. “That’ll larn ‘em.”

I was stressing over spending days upon days without my electronics, so I went out and bought a cheap tiny laptop to tide me over and be my backup and so I wouldn’t go completely bonkers over the weekend. So, Saturday night, guess what? My router went out.

All these “episodes” stopped being amusing somewhere around Thursday. OK, it somebody’s else’s turn now. I do not mind passing the buck to any one of you.

Murphy’s law bit me in the “back of my front side” four times and I’m getting just a little weary about the whole thing. I need some help putting Murphy in the ground.

The term Murphy’s Law (“If anything can go wrong, it will”) was born at Edwards Air Force Base in 1949 at North Base. It was named after Capt. Edward A. Murphy, an engineer working on Air Force Project MX981, (a project) designed to see how much sudden deceleration a person can stand in a crash. One day, after finding that a transducer was wired wrong, he cursed the technician responsible and said, “If there is any way to do it wrong, he’ll find it.” The contractor’s project manager kept a list of “laws” and added this one, which he called Murphy’s Law.

O’Tool’s commentary on Murphy’s Law: Murphy was an optimist.

The Unspeakable Law: As soon as you mention something … if it’s good, it goes away … if it’s bad, it happens.

Nonreciprocal laws of expectations: Negative expectations yield negative results. Positive expectations yield negative results.

Howe’s Law: Every man has a scheme that will not work.

Have a good day for me would you?

DALE LILLY,   AKA The Gilded Lilly, is the Lifestyles Editor and may be contacted at lifestyles@desototimes.com or 662-429-7397, ext. 248.

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